I consider myself androgynous. I am an adrogyne. For all my life I have been labeled things like 'tomboy' or 'a man's mind in a woman's body' or similar things. However, I do not wish to become male, but nor am I female. I wish to get a mastectomy, because my breasts are not part of who I am as a gender, and I've wanted them to vanish pretty much since they started growing when I was a kid. I've also considered getting a low dose of testosterone, nothing like the injections FtM's undergo, but just enough to balance my hormones more towards the level I wish for myself.
However, the hormonal therapy is on the back burner since I want some more information on what it will do to me, and if there are any risks to my ladybits if I were to start. But the mastectomy (top surgery) is something I honestly want as soon as possible. So here's my main issue. I've been reading up on transgenders and sex reassignment surgeries and gender identity disorder, and... I don't know if I honestly can even apply to get the GID so that I might pursue top surgery and maybe even hormones sometime in the future. Most of the definitions for transgendered is 'someone who wishes to be of the opposite sex', and I don't wish to become male, I wish to physically become androgynous. Which means the mastectomy.
But can I even get a GID diagnosis? Androgyne's are pretty much nonexistent, let alone FtA's like me. The only advice my counselor could give me at this point and time (I just broke the news to him two days ago about my gender identity) was to write a book. He said guaranteed someone would pick up the book, read it, and be able to relate.
Unfortunately, that does nothing to help me now.
Is there anyone going through something similar?
x-posted to genderqueer
- Female to Androgynous Transgender